Clip art?

I am trying my hand at some clipart and I'm not sure if I like it or not... You can let me know your thoughts here. I know they're not fancily vectorized like most clipart is. I kept the pencil lines and they're kind of crooked in places so they look homemade. If you like them and would use them or if you hate them and wouldn't, seriously let me know here.

Chess.

Did chess ever feel intense to you? No? That's because it's not. And truthfully, I can never actually remember which pieces are supposed to do what things but there's something about a well-made chess set that fascinates me. I can't see one without stopping to feel how heavy the pieces are and what they're made of.

Anyway, in a perfect world I think all chess pieces would look a little something like this:

Kind of What I Live My Life By.

Like and share, pretty please.

Not A Fog Bubbler.

All I ask is... like and share. :)

Here I said my next post would be directions to make a homemade fog bubbler. I lied.

Okay, let's talk. Let's talk about a little show from across the pond called Doctor Who. Maybe you've heard of  it. Maybe you haven't. Here is a brief explanation:

The Doctor is the last of the Time Lords. He travels through time and space with one or more companions. He has the ability to regenerate which means that every couple of seasons The Doctor is replaced by another actor. My favorite Doctor of all time (ALL TIME) is David Tennant. I love him. I love David Tennant. I love him. But he's been replaced now with Matt Smith, who is... I don't like him.

Anyway, The Doctor travels in a funny little spaceship called a TARDIS (Time And Relative Dimensions In Space). It looks like this:

Also, that's David Tennant. In the 1950's these kinds of phone boxes were all over the place in England. There was a phone on the front of each one with a direct line to the police and you could perform a citizen's arrest and keep the bad guys inside the box. It's explained that the TARDIS has the ability to camouflage itself as whatever it needs to for whenever/wherever it lands. Only it got stuck as a police box when they landed in the 50's. The Doctor claims he could fix it if he wanted, but he thinks it looks retro and cool the way it is (and I agree). 

Anyway, did I mention I love Doctor Who? Even though it's silly? Even though the special effects are really terrible? Even though the plots are mediocre?

Guess what I did.

I painted my bedroom door as a TARDIS.

You're jealous. I can feel it.

It turned out wonderfully, I think, and now I can pretend I am a time lord whenever I leave my room and say things like "timey-wimey, wibbly-wobbly... stuff."

So what if I'm a geek? Don't be rude.

The end.

Butterbeer, like I promised.

Today has a theme of Harry Potter. I love Harry Potter. But most of all I love Slytherin house. Let me tell you something. I knew I belonged in Slytherin house from the moment I first read about it. My obsession with Slytherin is borderline embarrassing. My first pair of glasses? Green. My favorite color? Green. My favorite Harry Potter character? Green. Just kidding. My favorite character is (and always has been) Draco Malfoy. Anyway, enough about Slytherin because what this is really about is Butterbeer.

If you don't know what Butterbeer is, you are probably living under a rock and are thus incapable of using the internet or something because, seriously? You don't know what Butterbeer is? It's what Harry Potter (and Draco Malfoy) drinks, that's what. And you should know this by now. Shame on you.

I've wanted to taste the sweet buttery goodness that is Butterbeer since I read the first HP book when I was eight. I've come across a few recipes in my internet travels and so I think mine is the heavenly amalgamation of the good parts from every one of them. Most of it comes from a recipe over at The Pastry Affair, which is a wonderful, wonderful place to find yummy things to bake. Hers calls for apple cider vinegar, which I thought was a bit too strong, and serves it kind of cold and I just think Butterbeer is supposed to be hot. Also, it didn't have enough of a butterscotch taste to me. Anyway, here it is:


Ingredients:

2 cups brown sugar
2 tablespoons water
6 tablespoons butter
2 teaspoons salt
2 ¼ cups heavy cream, divided
3 12-ounce  bottles of your favorite cream soda (I suggest Stewart's brand or IBC)
½ cup of butterscotch pudding mix
3 teaspoons apple cider


Combine brown sugar and two tablespoons of water; bring to a boil over medium heat. Turn off the heat after it boils for about one minute (make sure it doesn’t get any hotter-- you might have to take it off the burner). Set aside four tablespoons of this syrup to add to the whipped cream.

Next, add butter, salt, butterscotch pudding, apple cider, cream soda, and ¼ cup of heavy cream to the syrup. Stir over medium to high heat until the mixture is smooth and the carbonation from the cream soda is gone. It will look kind of like Jupiter:

For the topping, whip two cups (or more!) heavy cream (also don't forget to add sugar because apparently you have to add sugar when you whip cream... this is something I was unaware of and thought I would share. I added like a fourth a cup and it turned out well, so... yeah.) with the four tablespoons brown sugar mixture, which should be about room temperature but still a syrup (don't let it harden).

Serve hot with lots and lots and lots of whipped-brown-sugar-cream topping. It makes about 10-12 servings.

Now pretend you are Harry Potter.

The end.

P.S. It's super beautiful and perfect-looking, see:

P.P.S. Next I'll put up the directions for a fog bubbler and also my secret-y project that you can learn a clue about here.

Some More Shoes, Self Promotion.

Oh, hey. Here are some more shoes for your viewing pleasure.

BUT FIRST. Go here and like my Facebook page.

Second, tell people about Jab the Artist, also people on Facebook. If you really love me, you'll post a link to my blog or FB page to your profile. Also, if you like my stuffs and you have a Pinterest, you should maybe probably pin some things. You know. I just want to be rich and famous, and right now I'm not.

So there. Now that we have the shameless self-promotion out of the way, here are the shoes:

Unlike the Halloween Shoes, these do not fit the season very well. I apologize. These are very springy and happy. (Did I also mention I do custom shoes?)

Don't touch that dial! My next blog will be instructions for making your very own spectacular fog bubbler that makes spectacular bubbles for Halloween and stuff. I know you can buy them at Target, but mine is much cheaper--and more fun to operate! (Please picture jazz hands right now because that's what I'm doing while I write this). I also plan to post my favorite recipe for Butterbeer sometime soon--that's right, folks, just like the wizards and witches drink in Harry Potter. So lots of Halloween stuff to come. 

P.S. There is a very secret-y project going down in my bedroom right now and let's just say it has something to do with my very favorite TV series of all time....

Here's The Deal About Pictures.

The thing is, I don’t know anything about photography, so you have to judge these pictures the same way you would judge the pictures of a third grader, because seriously that’s probably about my skill level. Also, I don’t have a fancy camera. So double don’t judge me.

Here is a picture I took of a giraffe. Giraffes are wonderful, wonderful creatures.



Yeah for Shoes!

Guess what. Tis the season. The season for candy corn and costumes and pumpkins and pumpkin shakes and pumpkin cake and watching The Nightmare Before Christmas. And, if you live somewhere that is not southern Texas, it is also the season for sweaters and jackets and hot chocolate and apple cider. 

Anyway, here are some shoes with a theme specific to Halloween. You can tell because they have skulls and fall leaves and candy corn and stuff. 

Here they are.